I'm in a business venture with my father. It was his idea and is was a very good idea.
But from the get go, he started envisioning failure. It was all he talked about. This could go wrong and then that would happen etc etc.
He put loads of energy in this doom scenario.

And yes, it happened exactly as he envisioned it. He is almost happy it happened. He says, he now doesn't have to live with the tension of waiting for disaster to struck. Because it did.

Now, I'm not so happy. It feels like I'm in competition with my father visualising a good outcome.
Anybody else had this kind of an experience?

I feel that way with hubby all the time. We visualize things differently. Sometimes I am doom and gloom. Sometimes he is. It is easy to blame each other.

I keep reminding myself, I attracted hubby or the situation. In my case, I also am painfully aware that when I speak and visualize positively, I am still scared inside...sigh...haven't figured out how to fix the inside stuff yet.

Maybe you are subconsciously scared of the negative outcome too.

At least now days, I take responsibility for attracting the situation and outcome.

Presently, it doesn't make the situation any better, nor does it make me feel better. But I do recognize if I could TRUST (even more than staying goody two shoes positive and visualizing stuff), that all the situations would work out just fine.

"But I do recognize if I could TRUST (even more than staying goody two shoes positive and visualizing stuff), that all the situations would work out just fine."

Annie, you go girl! Stay with it! Trust will come more and more with each awareness and understanding you have and until then, blind trust and "goody two shoes positive" will work in the interim! Hang on to it! Have faith that the Universe is for you!

quote:

Originally posted by Liesbeth:
Anybody else had this kind of an experience?

Yes, absolutely, in a venture in the mid-90s working with a friend I had the exact same thing happen.

In the end I accepted that there are people (and it's their free will, good luck to them) who would rather experience/manifest the worst, than hope for the best.... and I decided that no matter how much I may care about them as individuals, they were not the right people for me to work with.

This in the end saved me from more conflict, because I wasn't trying to introduce people to my philosophy that "positive things happen to positive people" - which to a certain mindset sounds like the rankest heap of steaming Pollyanna <insert rude name for garbage> and to them was an insult to their "realism" and their own most heartfelt philosphies of life...

Hi Liesbeth,

I was in a situation like that with my mum recently. In my case, my mindset was that since she's the mama and I'm the daughter, she sets the pace. Also, I thought we had to succeed or fail together as a unit.

Eventually I got fed up with my mum's pessimism - and the resultant failures. I set myself apart from her mentally and adjusted my attitude to be like: 'Fail by yourself, I'm going to win.'

I've been manifesting individual success since while my mum manifests failure. Oh well.

Just a response to your question: What if someone else attracts your future?

From what I understand, no one else creates anything about our lives without our permission. On some level, we have to allow them to impact us or our future. And, if we don’t like it, we can stop allowing it. It’s all up to us.

“The first thing is that you have to take 100% responsibility for your life.” - Jack Canfield, co-author of ‘Chicken Soup For The Soul’

“We are each 100% responsible for all our experiences.” - Louise L. Hay, p. 5 of ‘You Can Heal Your Life’

“You always, always reap what you sow.” - - Oprah Winfrey

“When it’s all said and done, we are the reason for our successes and failures. It’s time for everyone to take responsibility for their lives, no matter the condition.” - Mark Victor Hansen

“All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make our world.” The Buddha

“You are the sovereign authority for your life. You are the ruler who makes the decisions regarding how you will act, what information you will accept. You do it anyway -- but if you RECOGNIZE that you do it, you can gain much greater control over your future.

But whether or not you accept it, you are sovereign. You rule one life -- and you rule it totally.” - Harry Browne, in ‘How I Found Freedom In An Unfree World’

“The goal of Deliberate Creation is to be able to consciously set your Point of Attraction. That means that how you feel is not dependent upon external circumstances. It is not dependent upon your mate doing the dishes or your child picking up his room or your friend calling you or who wins the election. Your Point of Attraction is determined solely by you, by what you believe, think, expect and feel. No one and nothing else is ever to blame - ever. No one makes you unhappy - you do that. No one can make you happy - only you can do that. It's your choice - always.” Dr. Robert Anthony

Phil

Great reminder, Phil.

Also remember that this is GOOD news

It can be a little disconcerting if one has lived one's life using the economy or politics or family etc as the reason they haven't done well, been happy etc. But it REALLY IS good news! We have 100% of the say over our lives. We can take back our power any time we want!

Leisbeth,

I agree with Phil (again.) NO ONE has the power to influence your future but you. The SOGR and LOA work for YOU as long and YOU are a conscious creator. You are never working at cross purposes with anyone else regardless of appearances.

In order to better internalize this, I had to create a wider framework for myself.

I think of ALL my experiences as reflections of myself. That means that I can affect ANYTHING in my life by changing my own thinking.

Imagine you were writing a novel and one character wanted a certain outcome to the situation. Is your vision competing with his? Of course not, because YOU'RE the writer. YOU decide how the story ends.

No one else can influence your life because in a way, they are all characters in your story. It may be hard to except, but your experience will confirm that when you change your own thinking, you effectively change your world.

Try it and see if it helps!

Love and blessings,
Rachel

quote:

Originally posted by Leslie B:
It can be a little disconcerting if one has lived one's life using the economy or politics or family etc as the reason they haven't done well, been happy etc.!

When I watch the news and see famines, drought, heartbreak, disaster, I remember the good things that have come from these (to be found in our history books - more on that in a minute) in the past, and I reflect upon my own personal faith.

My faith tells me that on a global scale, usually bad things lead to better things - this does NOT mean we "have to" attract badness and trials in our personal lives, of course - it tells me that sometimes you gain a sense of pride and selfhood through holding strong throughout a storm, that you would never gain in easy days.

An example would be, for many posters here, that you gained the right to say you live in the democratic and free United States of America after leaving countries that you weren't happy with, and after a bloody and destructive Civil War, and the ending of the atrocity of enslaving people because of skin colour.

Homeopathic news-reading?

Means to "cure like with like" - ie to see what tragedies (the Black Death, being one example) led to greater opportunites of "more life to all" and riches to all (the end of the serf system in much of western europe in my example) - so, when I read the news about brave protesters or some new abuse that's just been discovered, I am grateful that:

1. we live in world where such things matter - the eras in my country alone of public torture, branding slaves and burning witches, for example, may not have cared so much about this stuff;

2. the struggles and dreamers of the past DREAMED a better world for people elsewhere, and so it can be done again (isn't that the best test of a science - that like causes produce like results? )

This might be a step too far for people already immersed in noticing (and giving attention to) only the positive, but if you're not - well, me neither, but I still see evolution and hope and "more good to all" at work. Is why I'm sharing.

It's all good, and I salute the brave who attract to themselves the opportunities and challenges to build a better future (Wally, after all, said that the world IS evolving)...

quote:

Originally posted by annievt:
I also am painfully aware that when I speak and visualize positively, I am still scared inside...sigh...haven't figured out how to fix the inside stuff yet.

That's a great awareness. And I agree, it's not what you say or imagine that matters as much as how you FEEL.

quote:

I do recognize if I could TRUST (even more than staying goody two shoes positive and visualizing stuff), that all the situations would work out just fine.

I agree that having TRUST things are working out would ‘set you on the path.’ So, how can one get to where they TRUST the Universe to deliver? For me, one thing that helps is to ask certain questions and reach for the ‘feeling’ answer:

What might I feel like, if I DID trust the Universe to deliver? How would I feel if I trusted the Universe?

Here’s a thought. How does it feel when you trust that the coffee you are brewing is going to taste good, even before it’s done brewing? How does it feel when the hot shower you are looking forward to is on your mind? How do you feel when you trust that you'll be able to spend time with the friend you're longing to see next weekend? You know the feeling. Maybe try transferring these feelings to the idea of trusting the Universe for other things you desire, whenever you think of what’s to come in your future.

As a reminder to myself, I call this playing the Match Game -- matching our feelings with the conditions we want. Isn't this what Rebecca advocates (and might she know)?

“Tending to your own thoughts and feelings and letting yourself become the perfect match to your desires brings you joy and peace. And I promise you that your own joy and peace are the keys to everything -- EVERYTHING -- you want, for yourself and others.” - Rebecca Fine

Phil

Well to me it was proof this law of attraction works.
My father delivered the evidence.
That's the positive lesson I'll take out of it.

Though he would still think this stuff is "the rankest heap of steaming Pollyanna <insert rude name for garbage>"

and there is a pony in there someplace...

quote:

Originally posted by Liesbeth:
My father delivered the evidence.

I think you need to fire your father. If you need a biz partner, get someone who at least believes in the project and has some confidence and a constructive attitude.

Btw, what would prevent you from firing your father? Would you fire him if he weren’t your dad? Do you believe that because he’s your dad he has an unconditional right to be a part of your life?

I have a son. My belief is, if my son thinks I’m getting in the way of him having a wonderful happy life, he should have no qualms about putting distance between him and me. To me, he doesn’t owe me loyalty, just because I’m his dad.

What do you think?

What would prevent me from firing my father?

• Well for one, he is my father.
  
• We're in this together, we can't fire each other (legally)
  
• It's his money, not mine.
  
• He hasn't done anything wrong (logically speaking).
  
• I love my father.
  

And yes, I think because he's my dad, he has an unconditional right to be a part of my life.

Over the last two to three weeks, the Rector of the church I attend (for now, I will simply label it as belonging to one of the "conventional" denominations of Christianity) has been making the main underlying theme of his sermons the viewpoint that all the so-called problems facing society - both in my own part of the world, as well as across the globe - are, to use the popular phraseology, "signs of the approach of the second coming of Christ and the end of the world" (or, perhaps at any rate, his own particular understanding of what that entails).

To make a long story short, due to my way of thinking, which is rooted in the contents of some of the writings of Mr. Wattles and those of at least one other writer of that same time period - a discussion of which will take too much time to state here - I personally do not subscribe to the particular beliefs and opinions which our Rector broadcasts in his discourses.

"Wally" said something similar in Chapter 10 of SOGR, which I doubt I need to repeat here, and also many times in "The Science Of Being Great". The "bottom line", in my opinion, is that, other people's beliefs or opinions cannot and do not dictate and determine my future in any particular area of my life - either short-term or long-term - unless I accept those beliefs and opinions and make them my own. And the converse proposition is, again, in my opinion, also true.

And I volunteer that "... it is so with you, and with all of us".

"CAN YOU DIG IT?"

quote:

Originally posted by ITISIWAYNE:
The "bottom line", in my opinion, is that, other people's beliefs or opinions cannot and do not dictate and determine my future in any particular area of my life - either short-term or long-term - unless I accept those beliefs and opinions and make them my own. And the converse proposition is, again, in my opinion, also true.

And I volunteer that "... it is so with you, and with all of us".

"CAN YOU DIG IT?"

You are so right.
I started to think:"Please stop being so negative. If you go on like this, it will happen." I bought in to his negativity.

Thanks for clearing that up.

p.s. and off topic: I think it's great to get advise from somebody in an exotic place like Trinidad. Isn't the internet wonderfull?

Landscape boss fell in love the first time he saw me 20 years ago. I never gave him the time of day and never really liked him. I always feel like he is creating my future with his obsessive love cmi

Annie,

Don't you know by now (and all the posts on this forum and AH) that YOU are the only one who creates your future! PERIOD!

With love and appreciation,
LauraK

quote:

Originally posted by annievt:
I always feel like he is creating my future with his obsessive love cmi

I hear your fears there - I had an obsessive (ex) boyfriend who really got quite scary, threatened to kill himself and I wasn't too sure he wouldn't try the same on with me... and for longer than I care to admit the thought was in the back of my mind that, variously, I "deserved" terrible rejections (the karma theory), that it was somehow possible for someone to "curse" me, and so on... naturally I manifested a series of quite horrible experiences to prove that to myself.

In the end I realised that my theory was that, since I had rejected him, it just meant that "no one would ever love me the way he did" (his words) - and then I thought, bloomin' good thing, too!

You could equally have believed that this man's love shows you're an amazing and compellingly charming woman... but as long as you believe it, he's not creating your life, but your inner avatar of him (I mean like in a computer game) of him is in control.

(PS if obsessive love could create someone else's future, there'd be a lot of handsome movie stars married to housewives 25 years their senior, and guys who round up shopping trolleys would be treading the red carpet with all the starlets and models... that somehow doesn't seem to happen! So, I think you're safe! )

NO worries. He's a good guy. Just wonder how you counteract someone with such strong and clear goals and visions. It makes me feel like I have been living in everyone else's stream and I am just flowing along letting them manifest me and my life to accomodate them.

I've got to get some clearer goals before he sweeps me away and I end up married to a red neck. Can't have that.