Hello!
I often lurk at this forum and find it very inspirational and helpful. Recently I came across the preview of 'In Search of Effortlessness' Rebecca once sent out. I must have missed it but read it this morning.
http://www.scienceofgettingrich.net/lazypreview.pdf

Although I agree that success need not be based on 'hard work' I do take some issue with the opening statements. Perhaps because in my family, we suffered because of my step-father's extreme laziness and lack of motivation.

He did less than the minimum most of the time, worked only a few months of the year, collected union and state unemployment the rest of the year. And he was proud of it - getting 'free' money.

My mother, on the other hand ran her little shop 60 hours a week. We were barely above poverty level I found out years later.

Oh HE cooked, but not out of a sense of helpfulness, he did it so that he could eat whatever HE wanted.

We never went anywhere (cost money), very rarely went for a ride (costs money) etc etc.

My uncles/aunts on the other hand, were hard working, industrious, were not too proud to take on small jobs as retirees and enjoyed life because they had emassed quite a small fortune.

So I really have a problem with following in the book: '...couch potato laziness where avoiding work has its own glorious reward. This type of laziness certainly has its own value and charm and should be encouraged and nurtured as all lazniess is heaven sent.'

You can imagine my reaction. I DO take issue when a lazy egoist sponges off the efforts of others his whole life without even a trace recognition for those that did work to make ends meet at least.

I DO get the point of the rest of the pdf and agree. I got to where I am not thru hardwork but through a love and passion for what I did and the right decisions at the right time (in retrospect). It is not hardwork when you love what you do and it gives you the lifestyle you want...but even with that, I never 'worked hard' at it.

Sorry, but the opening statement of that pdf just enflames me. I think that misaligns the message because the sponges out there will be encouraged to carry on as is (and probably not bother to apply the rest of the books principal - a true sponge is not ever motivated except for their own interests).

Am I lazy? Oh yes, now and again, but no one suffers for it.

I really would appreciate others reflections on this. As you see, I have a 'problem with it' because of my childhood and what I see still going on with this comandeering pasha (I moved them here to Spain to give my MOTHER a better lifestyle and bought them a house across from me). She and I agree, when he 'passes away', her life will finally begin...and she is 77 (he, 93).

Couch potato laziness and encouraging it is fine - if you are single, live on an island and others are not affected by it.

In a flash of creative genius, your father created half of you. Therefore, the usage value of that act is equal to half of a lifetime. If your father had learned that success was the ability to "play the system", then perhaps the system had played his father and it is his right to return the favor. If you believe that your work ethic is better than your fathers, then as a teacher, your father has suceeded also in giving this to you. It makes me curious to know how much you have paid your father for half of your life and for the good things he has taught you. Do you know?

quote:

Originally posted by tosca:
...
I really would appreciate others reflections on this. ...

Couch potato laziness and encouraging it is fine - if you are single, live on an island and others are not affected by it.

A Warm Welcome,

Thanks for sharing, I am coming too from the experience of
"Consistent Effort ONLY = $$$ Cash $$$"

and I agree with you that
"The Lazy Way to Success: How to Do Nothing and to Accomplish Everything" it's an exageration and a streach like The Secret's over-simplifycation that attract big crowds:
"just feel good, imagine it, ask and it is given, IF you allow it, will simply fall into your lap"...

To me, mental effort with all SOGR Chapter 17 is needed to the letter, "no free lunch" ...

I've changed myself accordingly to SOGR PG course and now I can manifest faster and more important stuff, with inspired efficient action only, so I would be very curious for other similar experiences...

Best Wishes!

Hello Isaidso,

First off 'step-father' not father. And believe me I was very happy when my mother remarried...and I was eager to please at the young age of 10. Then reality set in. Years later I left home early because of the stressful life.

As the last born of 15 children to a wealthy father, he was utterly spoiled. Things happened, his father died when he was small, then the mother and things weren't so rosy anymore financially as much was lost.

Fast forward 50 years or so and he met my mother, saw a hard working German lady with her own little shop (with a very small income), lied quite a lot and little by little, he worked a few months of the year but my mother 6 days a week 60 hours a week. My mother did not have the confidance to divorce him...and regrets it today. His own 2 children will have nothing to do with him.

And as far as 'what I paid my (step)father'. He's sponged off my mother, benfitted from money I would send home over the years and was part and parcel when I moved my mother and him here to Spain for a better, safer retired life (daughter to help when they get older) and bought a house for them across from me.

But the insults continued along with the constant criticizing from the moment he opens his eyes. A rather miserable person to be around.

What did I learn from him? How not to be.

No, I don't owe him anything. Too much has been handed to him already.

quote:

and I agree with you that
"The Lazy Way to Success: How to Do Nothing and to Accomplish Everything" it's an exageration and a streach like The Secret's over-simplifycation ....

To me, mental effort with all SOGR Chapter 17 is needed to the letter, "no free lunch" ...

I change myself accordingly to SOGR PG course and now I can manifest faster and more important stuff,
Best Wishes!

Hola!

I have often seen where Chapter 17 is stressed to read again and again. It is a good one. In retrospect, I see how I have manifested in some way all my deepest goals - I believed in them, saw them, felt them and knew they would manifest. Now I have new ones and want to work on those but with better guidance thru W. Wattles works.

This summer I will have time to concentrate and want to start the SOGR course then. Thanks for the reminder. It is one of my goals.

Hello again tosca,

quote:

Originally posted by tosca:
Hello Isaidso,

First off 'step-father' not father.

This is quite a difference then, can you understand the concern in the other message posted by me?

quote:

My mother did not have the confidance to divorce him...and regrets it today.

Then it is sad that the only day possible for divorcing has already passed. Was this because of some laws in your country?

quote:

(originally posted by Tosca)I really would appreciate others reflections on this. As you see, I have a 'problem with it' because of my childhood and what I see still going on with this comandeering pasha (I moved them here to Spain to give my MOTHER a better lifestyle and bought them a house across from me). She and I agree, when he 'passes away', her life will finally begin...and she is 77 (he, 93).

Wow Tosca, this certainly triggers some stuff for me.
My father, may he RIP, was a very brilliant but overbearing individual who bullied everyone, especially when he drank. My mother used to run around like a frightened rabbit catering to his every whim. I was the oldest, the black sheep-and I protected everyone from him-to the point that I'd engage in fist fights with my father when he picked on the others. I hated my
mother for leaving us 4 kids at his mercy and not fighting back so I fought for her. I thought I was a hero. I felt needed this way in a family that otherwise didn't know that I existed. I hated him so much that I plotted
to murder him. I had a gun, and planned to shoot him in the head as he left for work. I had truly hit bottom spiritually and emotionally.

And then, I had a major spiritual awakening,(long story, but suffice it to say that it was quite dramatic) and through long-term-therapy and some amazing mentors and heavy-duty healing and spiritual work, I was able to let go of the hatred...so much so that I found myself talking to my father on the phone after not having spoken to my family in 8 years-and I had NO
BAD FEELINGS AT ALL. I was FREE and I KNEW IT!!

And when he died, I was relieved. I still do not miss him. But I thought that I'd have a real relationship with my mother finally. WRONG. You see, she ALLOWED my father to torment her, and did nothing to protect us.My
father DID NOT make my mother unable to be there, he was NOT to blame for
her emotional absence. She did it to herself-she created her own reality, just like I did at the time. But for this I have forgiven her also. To this day, although I do talk to my mother, I know that she is
emotionally unavailable. I have these needs met elsewhere now-and quite beautifully-it comes from WITHIN.

So Tosca, you are NOT alone-KNOW that. And KNOW that through forgiveness, your soul will be set free.

There is an AMAZING story in one of Rebecca's PG Course lessons on forgivess. Yes, even murderers and serial killers can be forgiven.

quote:

A California couple, Peter and Linda Biehl, were filled with pride when their daughter
Amy won a Fulbright Scholarship and went off to South Africa to work in the anti-apartheid
movement.When Amy was murdered by a mob during a riot, the Biehls had a choice to
make:
They could let their lives be consumed by hatred and anger or they could forgive. The
Biehls, who are white, could also have let their sorrow suck them into the ugliness of
racism and a desire for revenge against their daughters killers, who were black.
Amy was gone, and for a long while their grief was overwhelming. But ultimately the
choice they made was startling. They left their upper-middle-class jobs and lives and
moved to South Africa where they established a foundation in their daughter's name. There
they met two young men, two of the people who had murdered their daughter.
And they forgave them.

But the story doesn't end there. After these men were pardoned they went to work for
the foundation to try to atone for what they could not undo, and this unlikely foursome
became friends, more than friends. The two young men who killed her daughter now call
Linda, "Mom".

To many of us, the Biehls' choice may seem impossible, even incomprehensible. How
did they find the strength to forgive such horror? But when we stop and look with our new
eyes, look for the Truth, we begin to see that while their choice to forgive has certainly
benefited the two young men, it has been of much greater value to the Biehls. Instead of
lives twisted by bitterness and a desire for vengeance, they chose lives of service and by
doing so have created a living memorial to their daughter. They chose to build up rather
than to tear down. They have saved their own lives and the lives of others and they have
touched our lives, too, yours and mine.
This powerfully moving true story illustrates a last aspect of this subject of forgiveness,
and that is our responsibility for the world we are right now creating with our
thoughts and feelings.

Thanks for allowing me to share with you,
Warmly,
Julia

If anyone believes that Fred's "Lazy Way" book or SOGR or anything else based on using Law of Attraction to our benefit says to sit around and just wait for stuff to come to you, then that anyone needs to reread it all.

I agree TOTALLY with Fred that "hard work is not necessary." I would not have believed that ten years ago, but today, having learned these principles and continuing to learn and continuing to experience amazing, mind-blowing transformation in my life, I know it's totally true.

The less I work, the more money comes to me. Sounds weird and unbelievable -- until it happens to you.

But it has nothing to do with MENTAL laziness. EVERYTHING depends on lining up your own energy and getting your own thinking in harmony with what you desire and with your own True, Higher Self.

That means, in LARGE part, letting go of ALL thoughts and focus that move you AWAY from what you desire. And for most of us (and we've seen a LOT of this on this forum the past few days) that means letting go of:

• Criticizing others for ANY reason.
  
• Needing to be right (which means making others "wrong."
  
• Being AGAINST anything or anyone. (But go ahead and be FOR whatever makes you happy.)
  
• Blaming anyone else for ANYTHING in our own lives.
  

I could go on, but I think you get the idea. Whenever we are focused in any of the ways in that list above, it means we are focusing our thoughts and generating a lot of emotion around something we DO NOT want.

And the Law of Attraction, the Universe, will bring us more of THAT kind of thing. That's just the way it works.

So let everyone else be. Let go of all our old stories about what happened. Mr. Wattles says EXACTLY that, by the way -- that we should never talk about how hard we've had it in the past. And he also says that the only time there is or ever will be is NOW.

So right NOW -- and in every now moment -- what serves us best is to turn our attention AWAY from anything at all that is not what we want more of. Gently, without blame, without shame, without guilt. Just begin to let go of it and move back into appreciation of what we want and what we have.

That is the only kind of "work" that really gets us what we want. And when you think about it and begin to really "get" how all this works, you will be amazed at how your life opens up in countless ways and you ease back into the infinite, eternal flow of abundance of every kind.

"Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy?"

Thank you, Rebecca for your comments, they are well appreciated and helpful for me, right now.
Ruthie

quote:

Originally posted by Rebecca:
If anyone believes that Fred's "Lazy Way" book or SOGR or anything else based on using Law of Attraction to our benefit says to sit around and just wait for stuff to come to you, then that anyone needs to reread it all.

I agree TOTALLY with Fred that "hard work is not necessary." I would not have believed that ten years ago, but today, having learned these principles and continuing to learn and continuing to experience amazing, mind-blowing transformation in my life, I know it's totally true.

The less I work, the more money comes to me. Sounds weird and unbelievable -- until it happens to you.

But it has nothing to do with MENTAL laziness. EVERYTHING depends on lining up your own energy and getting your own thinking in harmony with what you desire and with your own True, Higher Self.

That means, in LARGE part, letting go of ALL thoughts and focus that move you AWAY from what you desire. And for most of us (and we've seen a LOT of this on this forum the past few days) that means letting go of:

• Criticizing others for ANY reason.
  
• Needing to be right (which means making others "wrong."
  
• Being AGAINST anything or anyone. (But go ahead and be FOR whatever makes you happy.)
  
• Blaming anyone else for ANYTHING in our own lives.
  

I could go on, but I think you get the idea. Whenever we are focused in any of the ways in that list above, it means we are focusing our thoughts and generating a lot of emotion around something we DO NOT want.

And the Law of Attraction, the Universe, will bring us more of THAT kind of thing. That's just the way it works.

So let everyone else be. Let go of all our old stories about what happened. Mr. Wattles says EXACTLY that, by the way -- that we should never talk about how hard we've had it in the past. And he also says that the only time there is or ever will be is NOW.

So right NOW -- and in every now moment -- what serves us best is to turn our attention AWAY from anything at all that is not what we want more of. Gently, without blame, without shame, without guilt. Just begin to let go of it and move back into appreciation of what we want and what we have.

That is the only kind of "work" that really gets us what we want. And when you think about it and begin to really "get" how all this works, you will be amazed at how your life opens up in countless ways and you ease back into the infinite, eternal flow of abundance of every kind.

"Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy?"

Hello Rebecca,

I just wish to reinforce what I said in my post, that I do agree with the rest of the pdf. I feel now that the statement about 'couch potato etc' was an unfortunate one. I would have liked to have read it followed up with something like your very good balancing statement about this having nothing to do with MENTAL laziness. Perhaps I took the author of the pdf to literally. As you see, it 'pushed a button'.

I was not intending to be critical, I thought I was clear in stating my opinion and giving an example from my own life experience. Sorry if I was misunderstood on this.

I fully realize that I alone am responsible for my 'emotional problem' regards my step-father. I've worked thru and solved several areas in my life successfully. However, some core problems really are very difficult. I will overcome that area too, I am sure.

And for myself, it is important to me that I am not misunderstood in what I say/mean - not necessarily whether I have right or not.

You are of course quite right about not having to 'work so hard' for abundance-but it does require that 'certain way' mental attitude. I have seen it in my life, as I mentioned. And I hope to learn thru SOGR how to fine tune that and grow further.

This great website shows the path and means thru W. Wattles message and your hard work and these forums offer such wonderful support. And for that too I am grateful.

Ancient Soul, I too can only say 'wow'. Though not all, there is much I see of me in your story. Some words surprised me with how they effected me...emotional absence (of your/my mother) and 'didn't know I existed'. Funny, I too was 'there' physically, but I don't think it ever occurred to her that I had emotional needs. I do defend my mother - I think she is a wonderful woman and we are very close, but...ah well.

But she knows very well her part in all of this. I try to remind her that the past is behind her and that it is not so 'out of her hands'. That she even now has the power of choice. There is a peace in that because it takes away the 'hopelessness/powerlessness' of a situation...that one is where one is because of a sequence of choices that no one forced upon us. It is also a little unsettling.

Divorce at one point though always possible was not an option (in her mind) because it meant he would get 50% of everything, but did nothing for it. And her 50% would not have been enough for a small apartment. Now at his high age, where would he go (she thinks)? He never learned how to fill out a check or where to buy socks. My mother did everything because involving him meant unnecessary complications. Ok...I am not dwelling on the past, just giving facts. We are trying to find a home that will take him.

Thank you so very much for sharing your personal story, it is amazing to me that I felt so relieved reading your story.

And also the second story. Quite moving and much to reflect on. Another 'wow' effect. You've been very helpful. Thank you again