Hello Great Fellow Travellers

I'm having trouble with something, hope to get some sort of perspective. I thank you in advance-I know this is a bit long.

Since reading SOGR and completing the course, I've been faithfully honoring myself by visualizing what I want, writing my gratitudes down daily, working on a single daily action. Devotedly, and it wasn't difficult. I enjoy it.

I do think, however, I've been working too hard at visualizing the how as well as the what.

I'm unemployed at the moment, been working on developing an online business, thinking that was how I was going to get rich. I've had difficulty continuing with this in the past few weeks due to what I believe are physical manifestations of my changing spiritual beliefs. So I am grateful for them, by the way.

A few weeks ago, while skiing and giving my all to life, I injured my sacrum, lower back-associated with money beliefs. I didn't allow it to REALLY slow me down. Then, in the past few days, I've become dizzy, off balance. That slowed me down. Finally I think I'm getting the message from the Source/Formless.

It took getting away from my online pursuits and my perceived need to make money to realize maybe I was trying to control too much. My visualization included myself as an online marketer. This isn't my background, more like a default, last ditch effort to make money and still stay home for my kids. This time off has enabled me to take a clearer look at what direction I want to go with my life. I just don't know the how.

My questions now are, Am I on track to visualize what my home looks like, how I want to live my life and trust the Formless will provide me with the Way? I think this is right. I'm having trouble trusting I'm thinking in the Certain Way.

My other question is has anyone else experienced physical manifestations of their spiritual changes? I have a huge passion for energy medicine and feel this is the direction to go, but don't know the how. Yet.

Thank you all, I look forward to your thoughts on this.

Gratefully and Gracefully,
Susan

I think you're doing very well. It's important that you get yourself well at this point. Try to keep your thoughts and emotions on what you want at this point. Visualize what you want to be with great joy, including well! The more that you can dwell in that state of where you want to be, with great joy and thankfulness for being there, the faster it will come to you.

There are online places that are exactly what you are looking for and will also help you get well. One that you might look at is www.glycostory.com/success if it pleases you.

"When your heart is in your dream,
No request is too extreme.
Everything your heart desires
will come to you."
-"When You Wish Upon A Star"
Walt Disney's "Pinocchio"

Best wishes,

Norman
operastar@adelphia.net

Norman Phillips

Hi Susan--

It definitely sounds like your subconscious is trying to tell you it has a better future in mind for you than the one you're trying to make happen.

Can you start a dialog with your subconcious? Either ask a question before bedtime and wait for the answer in dreams, or quiet yourself and do a meditation/journaling session that asks for direction to bring you to your best path?

You're very wise to be on the alert for clues in the form of injuries and illnesses--it seems like when we ignore the subtle feelings, this is the next notch up, and even then sometimes it fails to get our attention. You've done a good job to catch it this early in the game.

Go back to: what truly brings you joy? What do you simply love doing? Don't settle. And don't default. Have faith and keep moving towards the best possible life you can imagine.

Best of luck-- (Now I'll try to take my own advice!)

Ilana

Hi Suedee,

First, where you are and what you are experiencing is perfect. Your self awareness and observation is great. That's where the Aha moments come from.

For myself, I have experienced injury less over the last few years as I observed that my mind was elsewhere or in an agitated state when the injury was occuring. So, maybe, even though you were out "playing" to take your mind off your internet marketing, you were there in body but not in mind?
When I become aware my mind is not in harmony with what my body is doing, I say, "Now I am..." to bring me back to the now moment.

Re: your dizziness. Have you had alot of pollen or other allergens affecting your sinuses? Also, are you taking enough iron (dizziness is an iron deficiency sign) and a good B-complex and multivitamin? You may be deficient in a vitamin if you have been stressing a bit.

But there is metaphysical meaning in many of our body cues as well. Louise Hay has a book that gives definitions for body/mind signals. A few years ago I had asked to burn off a certain belief. Not long after, my words came back to me as I lay on the sofa for the tenth afternoon in a row, prostrate with a high fever. A friend of my housemate came into the room and asked me what was up and I told him. He just looked at me and asked, "So are you a goddess, or not?" !!!!

I gave it more thought and was fever free that day. Now I ask for joyful releasing! Maybe if you thank your body for the communication you've received already but ask to receive it in other, more enjoyable ways, you can be assured of a safer learning experience.

To help you clarify what you want to create. Keep up with lists and your dreams, some vague - where you list the quality you wish to have and others very detailed - where you list exact things that would please you. You are right about the attachment to the how.

It sounds like your bottom line right now is to have a certain amount of free time to be with your children.

I choose to limit the amount of time my 2 1/2 year old spends at a sitter's. Two of the things I do P/T that allow me to have him along are petsitting (he actually loves this - new pets, new houses to see, plants to water, mail to carry in) and cleaning for a B&B and vacation cabins. We bring a few toys and videos and he is actually getting big enough to help a bit. If I have more to clean than his patience level permits, I will arrange a play date or sitter time. If I had more patience for lots of kids at once, I would babysit, but I am also working toward a successful internet business and some of my time "home" with my child is spent doing computer stuff, and more that one toddler requires constant moderating! I am also a consulting astrologer, by word of mouth. I only have several clients a month, but my fee for a two hour session reflects years of study and experience, so I actually give the sitter a bonus for those sitting times.

Recently, I reflected that I have created a life of ease. No alarm clock, time with my children, service to others that pleases both me and them. I have much more I would like to create and certain things I am asking for largely.

Some of the things I am asking for seem beyond my personal ability to get. I know I must think this still, because I will catch my mind creating the how or trying to figure out how. When I examine this further, I realize that this masks the belief in a possibility of nonattainment. Then I look at what I am asking for and ask myself if nonattainment is an acceptable option. If the answer is no, I tell the "how" thoughts that there is no other option, therefore it is already on it's way, one way or another! This gives me a little feeling of excitement in my body, which must be the anticipation of knowing what I ask for is on the way. I've noticed that this little argument arises a few times before it is "forgotten" or the "how" is released.

You are doing great - keep on knowing!

Have a rich day!
Dunnea