Hi all

I'm new at this and slowly getting to grips with it. What i,m struggling with is, sometimes, really nice things have happened to me, although I had real doubt that they would happen. Other times things have turned out really badly,altough I truly felt they would turn out well.

On these occasions I was unaware of SOGR so never gave them much thought till now.

If I was truly believing something was going to happen, why did the opposite happen?

Hope someone can help me understand a little better.

Chelle xxx

quote:

If I was truly believing something was going to happen, why did the opposite happen?

Chelle,

For me, there were times when I thought I was truly believing in something, but what I was actually doing was really wanting and desiring it,… but not believing I could actually have it. Or, especially, not feeling how I’d feel IF I ALREADY HAD IT.

So, there was still a separation, a distance or incongruence between how I was BEING and the thing or experience I was wanting to actualize or manifest.

Whereas, at other times, I felt no discomfort about a thing, and things I wanted just 'fell in my lap' with no big efforting or desiring on my part. (Most importantly, no resistance.)

So, are you really sure what state you were in, in those instances that seemed to happen contrary to how you believed?

From my experience, I know there were times I vividly could imagine how wonderful it would be if, say, some person I adored would love me back. But this was a very, very strong WISH, not a belief in the reality of it. The truth, I think, was, back then I didn’t really feel WORTHY and DESERVING of a terrific relationship (and many other things).

Let me ask you something fundamental. Do you believe you are wonderful? If so, do you FEEL wonderful? In other words, are you just terrifically pleased to be YOU? This, to me, is the foundation. Our sense of self is the foundation that most of our other beliefs and feelings build on. If our sense of self is shaky then our beliefs and feelings for the things we want are like structures built on sand.

It seems to me, if our sense of self is shaky it could easily cause our 'manifestation skills' to be very hit or miss.

Phil

Hello Chelle,

welcome to SOGR, sounds like you are going to benefit greatly. If I may, I have been there before wondering why this, when I wanted that.

I went through a painful realization in the last few years about what I thought I wanted (head) and what I really desired (heart). I am by no means an expert here, however typing this out helps me reaffirm the positive things and my mission in life. I do not know fully what I truly desire 100% today, although most of it, and it gets more clear every day.

First you need to focus on what you really want, and don't rush it. As for attracting the bad stuff, here's an example that may help. Many people want to be debt free as a start in their financial life. They say "debt" free, and usually with very strong emotions and feelings. The problem with this is that the word "debt" and the associated strong feelings keep being impressed on the formless universe, God, whatever you choose to call it. As I understand these teachings, that is why the debt hangs around, cause you keep saying and impressing it. Why not say "my finances are 100% equity or paid for", or something of the like.

What this does is switch your thinking from scare-city to abundance, negative to positive. This is just an example, hopefully a coherant one, but I think you get the point. It may take a while for these teachings here to settle in, however please perservere, it will change your life.

As for past events either good or bad, if you really take the time to think about them, you will recall a finite decision or thought you may have forgotten about or didn't think meant anything, and guess what, here you are!

Another thing that helps me is realizing you cannot control anything in life other than your thoughts, responses and actions. If something bad happened, it is likely becuase the other persons desire for that "bad" outcome was greater than your desire for a good outcome. This may help identify what you really want. Don't worry about keeping up with the Jones', keep up with Chelle.

Hope this helps, best wishes and success.

KAJ

quote:

If I was truly believing something was going to happen, why did the opposite happen?

Chelle,

Here’s a little true story that might shed some light on this subject. (Or, it might not,….)

Waay back when we were in high school, one of my older brothers had a HUGE crush on a girl. He would even record messages on a little portable tape recorder he had, where he’d say over and over, “I love ____. I love ______,” with all the emotion and angst you can imagine a teenager can have. (Now, I don’t know why he did this, because he wasn’t giving the tape to the girl.) In any case, it didn’t pan out.

Now, fast forward to a couple years after high school. By then my brother had gone on to be friends with other girls, and had gotten over the former crush he had. So, what happened? The girl he had a crush on in high school now wanted to have a relationship with my brother. But now my brother wasn’t interested.

What does this mean? What it seems to mean to me is, back in high school my brother really wanted the girl, but a part of him was believing it was impossible, for whatever reason. (Or else, wouldn’t he just tell her he like her?)

But still, I believe he put a ‘vibe’ out into the Universe about this girl. And then, years later, when he had no resistance to the idea (since he’d gotten over her and didn’t really ‘care’ anymore) the ‘vibes’ he put out were now getting to the girl and maybe she didn’t even know why all of a sudden she had this urge to contact my brother and want to start a relationship with him.

Just a speculation.

In my own life I’ve had numerous incidences where something didn’t pan out as I originally thought it would. But upon reflection I believe I had some resistance (disbelief) about at least some of them. Because, interestingly, later in my life the thing would just ‘show up’ without any efforting or pining, angst or whatnot on my part.

This has happened to me with athletic skills, as well as with girls I’ve known, and also with music skills I was trying to develop. For example, I remember a period of about a year where I studied very intensely jazz piano theory and improvisation. During that year my playing just got worse and worse, until finally I just ‘gave it up.’ So guess what then happened? It all started to make sense and come together. After I ‘gave up’ something in me changed because I now just ‘knew’ how to integrate what I’d been learning.

Same thing with my tries at being an athlete in high school. I tried but was terrible at everything.

Then, years later, when I was just doing athletic things purely for fun, I developed some skills absolutely easily and effortlessly.

I’ve had similar kinds of experiences with finding work, or gaining some work related skill. I often did better when I figured out how to just ‘relax’ about it all.

Now, if nothing I just wrote is helpful, then maybe just consider this little passage from Abraham-Hicks:

“We are here to help you get what you want. And so the process that we move forward is two-fold. Its purpose will help you in (1) the clarification of what you want, and its purpose is (2) to assist you in achieving the vibrational stance that will let you allow what it is that you want. And that, in a nutshell, is what Deliberate Creating is: Identifying and allowing. Identifying what you want and then achieving a vibration that will allow what you want to come to you. The work that we see that is mostly your work, however, we have to say this to you bluntly -- your primary work is (2) to lower your level of resistance. In most cases, you have done enough wanting to keep yourself busy for twenty or thirty lifetimes. You are not short on wanting. You are not short on the clarity of what you want but you are, most of you, short on vibrationally allowing what it is that you want. Have fun with it and be easy about it.”

I think the "be easy about it" part is key.

Phil

Thanks Phil also to Kaj

Slowly getting the picture,the story you tell of your brother hits home (the girl he liked)

Had many occasions when I have received things when I wasn't bothered about them anymore.

You are right I do need to relax, be easy about it.

Discovering the Law of attraction, has been the best thing ever to happen to me. It has really opened my mind to things I never imagined and makes sense. I have a lot of work to do with myself, I realise that. My head is whizzing about with all the information I am trying to digest but littlt by little things are clicking.

Thank you

Chelle xx